Friday, August 19, 2011

Saying No

I find it really hard to say no to opportunities that come my way. I love helping others, volunteering (mostly work related), and just doing what I can to make things better and easier for others. I am on several committees, have been awarded a few grants, serve as secretary for a committee, am an editor for a national consumer health website, have written papers and presented at regional and national conferences, and serve as chair for another committee.
Next fall one of the organizations I'm involved in will be having a quad conference with other organizations in Baltimore. They need help for several committees and I want to help so much, but I have been reluctantly saying/thinking no and deleting the e-mails. I am notorious for my clean inbox (I store everything in folders or delete them) and only leave to-do items in my inbox. These e-mails have been staying there for more than a day before I delete them, which is very unusual for me. I really want to volunteer, but with all of my responsibilities I don't know if it'd be wise. I have a ton of stuff to do at work and am trying to increase the view/presence of the library across campus. I'm also working with other staff to implement outreach programs and creating an iPad loaner program. Saying no to the request for help is difficult for me, but I know others will step up. I really want to help, but I think it would mean that I don't give my all to something or I do and run myself ragged.
Do you have a problem saying no? Are there areas that you want to say yes or feel obligated to say yes, but know you shouldn't? I encourage you to think about it. Are you saying yes to something for your family because you feel obligated? Are you going to church out of obligation or because you want to? I try not to do anything out of obligation because I end up hating what I'm doing or resenting people. Although, others may hate that you aren't a yes person anymore it may do more for your mental health than you think. Say no. Try it. Say no and let things fall in place. Who knows what will happen.

5 comments:

CIB said...

I can't wait to try this one out. hehehehe.

Actually, I think I have more of a problem saying "no" instead of saying "yes". I typically respond "no" to pretty much everything. Even things I might want / need to do.

Fortunately I have an AWESOME wife who helps to balance me out.

You should meet her one day.

~Ivan

Just Me said...

:-) hehe Sometimes you do say yes to things you shouldn't, though. You usually just say no to me wanting to spend tons of money...on a car, vacation, a Mac. Stuff I don't need, but want. Well, except the vacation, I do need one of those and so do you. Thanks for commenting.

Mrs A said...

Saying no id definitely easier when you have someone backing you up! I always have to spend a couple minutes in the morning prioritizing what I want to do even though I know in my heart that bumping things to the bottom is essentially the same as saying "no" to doing them.

Just Me said...

Prioritizing does make that happen. But if the things you place at the top are that important then you actually have good reason. I hate when people already have plans with me then break them to do stuff with other people. That shows where I stand and how I'm valued by others.

Just Me said...

haha Ok, I just realized you could take the last part of that comment wrong. I promise I'm not talking about what happened with us the other day...that was just total confusion. And a little funny with Peter having the completely wrong date on his watch.